Take a look before it's too late

As I may have mentioned previously, I am a nurse. The place where I work is for me quite ordinary but for the people I take care of it is often the place where a major life changing event takes place. Sometimes I experience something that brings that home for me and really makes me think.

I recently took care of this guy who just had a surgical procedure having to do with his recent cancer diagnosis. He was in awesome shape to start with (and by awesome, I mean awesome for a 30-something although the guy was in his 60s) which definitely will help, as well as the fact that the cancer is a survivable type and was caught pretty early. He was lying in the bed and he said: "I think I want to do some volunteering. This whole thing has made me look at my life and I realized that I've been pretty self-absorbed." If he is lucky this guy will still have time to make use of his reflections and make his life into something he is proud to look back on. Probably he will (I hope so).

This looking back at one's life seems to be something that happens to a lot of people in adverse situations. It generally happens in a financial way to people who have money trouble. When I had a lot of debt I reflected on my financial life: "All that money I spent, did I really do anything good with most of it? Will it do anything to improve my life?" I learned that what I was doing with my money wasn't making me happy and I changed the way I behaved for the better. It is too bad it took big debt to make me look at what I was doing. Now I am pretty good with how I manage my money and when I reflect on it I am generally pleased, but finances are just one aspect of my life.

This man's reflections reminded me that I need to look at the complete picture of my life once in a while. What do I wish I was doing more of? or less? Who do I want to be and what am I doing to get there? How are my relationships with my family, friends, and community? I look at my financial picture regularly but how often do I reflect on my life as a whole? Not very often, and usually only when something bad happens. Then I rediscover regret, when it is too late to change things.

I decided to make a list (I am a girl who loves her lists) of things I think are important in life as they relate to self, personal relationships (family and friends), and community. This could be a very long list but I am only going to include two items per category: one thing I am doing right and one thing I need to work on. These are things that I would be really sad about if I reach the end of my life and realize that I failed to accomplish/maintain.

1. Self

Doing well: Growing as an artist in regards to some of my craft interests, especially embroidery and woodworking.
Needs work: Changing my eating habits to more healthy habits so I don't shorten my life with junk food.

2. Personal Relationships

Doing well: um, actually, nothing. I've really been ignoring people and taking them for granted lately. No wonder I feel bad about some of my behavior.
Needs work: (see above)

3. Community

Doing well: Staying informed by reading newspaper, read neighborhood group postings regularly.
Needs work: I have chosen to aid my community by helping eradicate graffiti. I used to go out and clean tagged utility boxes and street signs and such but I've been wrapped up in my own life and haven't done this for months.

This is the result of some of my self reflection. I wanted to share my reflections and the story of the man who hopes to have another chance at a better lived life in the hopes that someone who reads this will do the same. We are personal finance bloggers but when you consider what really matters it is people who matter more than money.