Not the stimulus I envisioned

I find it hard to wrap my head around some of the ginormous numbers coming out of Washington these days. The billions for Iraq and the $700+ billion corporate rescue package of last year were bad enough, but this new "stimulus" package seems to be shaping up to put them to shame. Mr. ToughMoneyLove has a new post about some of the things in the package (he actually looked at it, brave man) and I think I am going to be sick.

When I supported Obama's "Change" campaign I was envisioning something a little different from turning America into a pseudo communist welfare nation.

We the people, individually and collectively as a nation, have the ability to help pull ourselves out of the mess we are in. I was imagining a leader who would inspire us to want to invent new things (intellectual stimulus) especially in the alt energy area; get involved in our communities by putting together citizens' groups to clean up our cities, perform community service, and more (inspirational stimulus), all of which would make us better off and save the gov't money that it would have to spend on these services.

Instead, all I am hearing about is how Washington is going to solve everyone's problems by giving them money instead of letting them learn by their mistakes or working for help. Between the budget shortfalls in the federal government and the California state government, both of which are going to be made up for with higher taxes on ME, I feel like I am caught in a pincer. And by the way, all those nice handouts and mortgage help? So far it looks like I will be ineligible for any because my property value has fallen too far and my loan is too big. Nor will the "Making Work Pay" tax credit help me because my income is too high (only because I live in California where a high income is necessary to live as well as a person almost anywhere else would live with less than half of what I make). Maybe I shouldn't adjust my withholding if my tax rate is going to go up.

Ending on a positive note, because I do like to think positively, I don't have to wait for Obama to lead me to do the things I think people should be doing. I can do it on my own. It just would be nicer to have some leadership and some company in my efforts.

Take a look before it's too late

As I may have mentioned previously, I am a nurse. The place where I work is for me quite ordinary but for the people I take care of it is often the place where a major life changing event takes place. Sometimes I experience something that brings that home for me and really makes me think.

I recently took care of this guy who just had a surgical procedure having to do with his recent cancer diagnosis. He was in awesome shape to start with (and by awesome, I mean awesome for a 30-something although the guy was in his 60s) which definitely will help, as well as the fact that the cancer is a survivable type and was caught pretty early. He was lying in the bed and he said: "I think I want to do some volunteering. This whole thing has made me look at my life and I realized that I've been pretty self-absorbed." If he is lucky this guy will still have time to make use of his reflections and make his life into something he is proud to look back on. Probably he will (I hope so).

This looking back at one's life seems to be something that happens to a lot of people in adverse situations. It generally happens in a financial way to people who have money trouble. When I had a lot of debt I reflected on my financial life: "All that money I spent, did I really do anything good with most of it? Will it do anything to improve my life?" I learned that what I was doing with my money wasn't making me happy and I changed the way I behaved for the better. It is too bad it took big debt to make me look at what I was doing. Now I am pretty good with how I manage my money and when I reflect on it I am generally pleased, but finances are just one aspect of my life.

This man's reflections reminded me that I need to look at the complete picture of my life once in a while. What do I wish I was doing more of? or less? Who do I want to be and what am I doing to get there? How are my relationships with my family, friends, and community? I look at my financial picture regularly but how often do I reflect on my life as a whole? Not very often, and usually only when something bad happens. Then I rediscover regret, when it is too late to change things.

I decided to make a list (I am a girl who loves her lists) of things I think are important in life as they relate to self, personal relationships (family and friends), and community. This could be a very long list but I am only going to include two items per category: one thing I am doing right and one thing I need to work on. These are things that I would be really sad about if I reach the end of my life and realize that I failed to accomplish/maintain.

1. Self

Doing well: Growing as an artist in regards to some of my craft interests, especially embroidery and woodworking.
Needs work: Changing my eating habits to more healthy habits so I don't shorten my life with junk food.

2. Personal Relationships

Doing well: um, actually, nothing. I've really been ignoring people and taking them for granted lately. No wonder I feel bad about some of my behavior.
Needs work: (see above)

3. Community

Doing well: Staying informed by reading newspaper, read neighborhood group postings regularly.
Needs work: I have chosen to aid my community by helping eradicate graffiti. I used to go out and clean tagged utility boxes and street signs and such but I've been wrapped up in my own life and haven't done this for months.

This is the result of some of my self reflection. I wanted to share my reflections and the story of the man who hopes to have another chance at a better lived life in the hopes that someone who reads this will do the same. We are personal finance bloggers but when you consider what really matters it is people who matter more than money.

New goal

I'm taking the whole weaning myself off of my dining out habits thing in short steps. First I stayed away from fast food, then I stayed away from my favorite restaurant for a week (still no fast food). I took a week off and allowed myself a fast food meal and a couple meals at my favorite restaurant (but that is still a lot less than my prior pattern). I still eat at other restaurants but not as often. Now I am going to spend the next two weeks without fast food or my favorite restaurant. I bought mini cans of my favorite soda so I can have a soda when the urge to go out is really bad. Part of my dining out problem is my addiction to soda; I go to the restaurant because I want soda and end up (of course) eating a whole meal. Eventually my plan is to stop drinking soda as well, but if I did it all at once I'd end up on the floor, twitching. So one small step at a time, building on each prior success.

Small steps and building on past success are what helped me succeed with getting my finances under control and getting out of debt so I am going to try to apply those same principles to my dining out habit.

The reductions in dining out so far have saved me about $60 in the last two weeks. That's enough money to buy lavender plants to plant my parking strip without having to take from another budget. Yipee!

The Frugal Funeral

Recently I wrote a post about canceling my whole life insurance, and one of the selling points of the insurance was about getting money to my family right away so they could pay my "final expenses". That started me thinking about another area to be frugal: my funeral. If I'm going to have a frugal funeral then I don't need to waste a bunch of money paying for glorified funeral insurance.

If you're really frugal then you don't need a fancy funeral and your family should know it. Forearmed with that knowledge they can go the funeral home and fend off the guilt trip about showing their love one last time by buying the Cadillac coffin with all the extras: viewing, programs, flowers, staff to man the doors, etc.

My dad's funeral as an example of the frugal funeral:

My father died just over two years ago, and his funeral only cost a couple thousand. When he died my parents were up to their eyeballs in credit card debt and a pricey funeral would have put my mom over the edge. Fortunately, my father had no interest in fancy things. He grew up really poor and never got past the idea of having a mostly frill-free life (mom was the spender).

Does the choice of funeral home affect cost? I don't know. We just went to the one that advertised in the free church calendars. My mom and I had already been there on an 8th grade class field trip so there was some comfortable familiarity. (Yes, my school went on a field trip to the funeral home. We even got to see the embalming tables.) Knowing my dad didn't care about a fancy display, we were able to go right into the funeral home, choose the inexpensive cremation package, and be done with it.

Aside from the cremation costs, the expenses were minimal. Mr. K and I made the programs and prayer cards ourselves, one of my sisters made a photo collage of my dad's life to display, my other sister bought a fabric covered journal book for guests to sign, and the church was already bedecked with flowers for Christmas which was decoration enough. I baked cakes from scratch and we hosted the wake at home. The pastor of our church knew my dad well and gave a beautiful sermon. I know my dad would have been pleased by what we did, he liked home made stuff and gifts of time rather than money.

Caveat to not saving money for a funeral: The only reason I can see for wanting to have a bunch of money for a funeral is to give to relatives to defray their travel cost. Instead of that, how about getting together while everyone is alive? Isn't that better?

On an environmental note: Not getting embalmed saves money and the environment. Embalming chemicals are pretty nasty, are they the last contribution you want to make to the Earth?

The Frugal Mindset

Part of living a healthier financial lifestyle involves developing a frugal mindset, which goes hand in hand with conservation. If you are frugal, you are already adhereing to two of the three Rs of conservation: Reuse, Reduce and Recycle. With a frugal mindset, there are set pathways in your mind and your thoughts follow them automatically. The idea of the frugal mindset and its link to conservation came to mind after I read a newsletter from the state water district which included tips to reduce water use. One of the tips was to wash only full loads of laundry. The way I think about new sheet and towel purchases is only one example of how a frugal mindset works.

When I buy new things such as towels, sheets, and clothes one of the things I automatically consider is how I will wash them. If the color or material is such that it requires special care then I probably won't buy it (Lucky for me that my employer provides and will launder all my work clothes so I don't have to worry about business attire). I would probably not buy bright red towels unless I had lots of other things in bright red so they could all be washed in one load together. The tile in my bathroom is an unusual color scheme that goes best with black towels but since black is a common color in both my and Mr. K's wardrobe gathering a full load is no problem. Washing full loads saves me money in water and energy bill and also saves resources.

If I didn't have a frugal mindset then my main considerations would be style and enjoyment. I could end up having to wash some items separate from my other things because the fabric requires special handling or the color bleeds. Not only would this cost me money in water, electricity, and wear on my washing machine, it would also cost me in time and energy as I worried about sorting out my special items, keeping them out of the regular loads, then waited for the special loads to wash. If I take all that into account the special items don't seem worth it, do they?

Looking to increase my work hours, keeping my fingers crossed

One way I can improve my finances is by making more money. I work .7FTE (full time equivalent), 8-hour shifts now which means 56 hours in a two week pay period, plus on-call. I want a .9FTE 12-hour shift position because it would be six days working per pay period instead of seven and more hours (thus more money) but I have to wait until everyone with more seniority in my work area who wants a 12-hour position, has one. This seniority rule is part of the union contract and is not flexible. There is one person ahead of me on the list. I just heard that one position for sure, but probably two positions will be opening up very soon. If there are two positions then I will get one. Hooray!! Sixteen extra hours per pay period will be a big boost to the size of my paycheck! I am pleasantly optimistic now and awaiting final word hopefully by the end of the week.

Milestone achieved

My goal for last week was to not eat out at my favorite restaurant during the week. I do it so often I found it had become a compulsion (or addiction, choose your word) and I went even when I wasn't interested in going. I am also avoiding fast food in general. The occasional french fry will eventually be OK, but I was eating meals there several times a week. Yikes!

So far I am doing well on my plan to avoid fast food and I successfully stayed away from my favorite restaurant all during the week last week. The first two days away from my favorite junk were rather hard, then it became a little easier. The weather has been unpleasant lately which makes it easier to stay home. I did eat out a few times, but not as often and not following the compulsion to go to my favorite place. I have more money in my wallet than I usually do at this point between paychecks, let's see if I have any left over by next paycheck. That would be nice.